I recently came upon a link for Kelly McGonigal’s TED talk — How to Make Stress Your Friend. I chuckled at the title and clicked.

My life has been feeling quite stressful for what seems like a very long time — cancer, doctor’s visits, elderly parents who need more care, the many things I don’t know and can’t control, teaching, coaching, finding a good work/life balance, and more. For sure, my life is filled with goodness and blessings, but those are some of the things that can be fodder for angst and stress. If I can make stress my friend, I’m in! Not surprisingly, part of me was a bit incredulous, and with a wrinkled brow and raised eyebrow, asked “Make stress my friend? Get out. How about we just not have it?” Interesting, but highly unlikely, so making stress my friend, it is.

Kelly shared some of the things that happen in our body when we are stressed — including having a rise in oxytocin. A rise in oxytocin? Wow! I had no idea our body released oxytocin in response to stress. The rush of oxytocin — Kelly says — encourages us to seek out support, and helps protect our cardiovascular system. It even helps to heal and regenerate heart cells.

The story we choose to tell ourselves about stress and our response to it, is incredibly important. We can tell ourselves stress is bad and is killing us. Or, we can do what Kelly suggests, and choose to view our stress response as positive — our stress response is our body preparing us to meet the challenge. When we choose this story, says Kelly, our body believes us, and our stress response becomes healthier. Amazing, right?

So I continue all sorts of practices to help my body, mind, and soul be peaceful and happy. I breathe, pray, do yoga, hike, rest, hang out with friends, make art. And, I remind myself that stress, and my response to it, need not be negative.

Guess what I’m thinking now? You guessed it. How will I integrate this information into my day to day (moment to moment) teaching practice and relationships with my Kindergartners? How might I help them begin to make friends with stress and their response to it?

Definitely check out Kelly’s website, and listen to her TED talk. It’s worth the 15 minutes.